So, we've lived in Honduras for 5 months and it has taken a while to really absorb these cultural differences. I have been wanting to describe to help you understand what it is like, but it is more than just visual or physical. There is an emotional side to living abroad and working in the mission field that I know I can't adequately put into words.
And, if you know me, speaking about emotions is not my strong suit, so I'll give a few examples to draw you into my current world view. The other day as I was leaving work, there were some obvious contrasts that presented themselves:
CONTRAST - As I walked out the door of the mission there was a young man probably in his late teens who had put on his best clothes after crisply ironing them to wait for someone to exit the building so that he could find out who to talk to about getting a job. And the contrast just several minutes later as I was starting my drive was a man staggering up past the bus stop oblivious to the traffic around him because he had been drinking away his problems.
CONTRAST - Early in the mornings as I drive to work there are people outside the fronts of their businesses and vending stands who sweep the dust. Mind you, dust here is everywhere and sweeping the pavement seems to me to be futile, but I have a lot of respect for anyone who is trying to present their best and works hard to make a living. But, at the same time, I see a taxi driver (one of the hundreds in this little city) who is stopped at a stop sign and just drops his trash from his morning breakfast right on the street not caring that his selfish act affects everyone who lives in the area. Litter is everywhere and it is one thing that no one seems to want to change.
CONTRAST - I often see young people walking home from school hand-in-hand in groups of friends, laughing and sharing their thoughts with what appears to be genuine care for one another. And I also see the children across the street who have been taken from their homes because no one in their house has the ability to care for them properly. They look through the gated entry of the foster home and plead with their eyes for hope for a better circumstance.
CONTRAST - There are a few children in the neighborhood who have eagerly come over to visit our dog. They have such wonderful patience for our choppy Spanish and have accepted that we are friends they can trust to share a laugh with and get a kiss from a puppy. They don't care that we are different in speech and looks. Compare that to the truckload of workers driving down the road who throw out catcalls and snide remarks to some of the wonderful young ladies we have working for the mission. It is hard not to be noticed when you have pale skin and are an outsider. This has affected me more than I would have initially thought, but it is also an opportunity to show kindness and a smile to those who are curious.
CONTRASTS ... really, that is part of the emotional aspect -- the desire to do good and serve others versus the overwhelming feeling of never being able to do enough to "fix" the brokenness. Some days it is hard - mentally, emotionally, and physically.
But, when I think of the task/challenge/opportunity we've been given, I realize that it is a process. That God is working in me and on me as well. Some of the brokenness is me and I am learning every day that we are all in this together as God's children.
There have been a number of Honduran women here who have sincerely offered encouragement to attend several different functions. They seem to sense that welcoming the stranger in their homeland is the hospitality of which the Bible speaks. They give grace with the struggle for choosing words in my second language and are just happy that I try to communicate.
So, I really don't have any epiphanies about how this all ends with a nice shiny bow on a pretty package. But I do believe, each day I grow closer to God as I seek to find my place in this great big world.
Matthew 6:33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
And, if you know me, speaking about emotions is not my strong suit, so I'll give a few examples to draw you into my current world view. The other day as I was leaving work, there were some obvious contrasts that presented themselves:
CONTRAST - As I walked out the door of the mission there was a young man probably in his late teens who had put on his best clothes after crisply ironing them to wait for someone to exit the building so that he could find out who to talk to about getting a job. And the contrast just several minutes later as I was starting my drive was a man staggering up past the bus stop oblivious to the traffic around him because he had been drinking away his problems.
CONTRAST - Early in the mornings as I drive to work there are people outside the fronts of their businesses and vending stands who sweep the dust. Mind you, dust here is everywhere and sweeping the pavement seems to me to be futile, but I have a lot of respect for anyone who is trying to present their best and works hard to make a living. But, at the same time, I see a taxi driver (one of the hundreds in this little city) who is stopped at a stop sign and just drops his trash from his morning breakfast right on the street not caring that his selfish act affects everyone who lives in the area. Litter is everywhere and it is one thing that no one seems to want to change.
CONTRAST - I often see young people walking home from school hand-in-hand in groups of friends, laughing and sharing their thoughts with what appears to be genuine care for one another. And I also see the children across the street who have been taken from their homes because no one in their house has the ability to care for them properly. They look through the gated entry of the foster home and plead with their eyes for hope for a better circumstance.
CONTRAST - There are a few children in the neighborhood who have eagerly come over to visit our dog. They have such wonderful patience for our choppy Spanish and have accepted that we are friends they can trust to share a laugh with and get a kiss from a puppy. They don't care that we are different in speech and looks. Compare that to the truckload of workers driving down the road who throw out catcalls and snide remarks to some of the wonderful young ladies we have working for the mission. It is hard not to be noticed when you have pale skin and are an outsider. This has affected me more than I would have initially thought, but it is also an opportunity to show kindness and a smile to those who are curious.
CONTRASTS ... really, that is part of the emotional aspect -- the desire to do good and serve others versus the overwhelming feeling of never being able to do enough to "fix" the brokenness. Some days it is hard - mentally, emotionally, and physically.
But, when I think of the task/challenge/opportunity we've been given, I realize that it is a process. That God is working in me and on me as well. Some of the brokenness is me and I am learning every day that we are all in this together as God's children.
There have been a number of Honduran women here who have sincerely offered encouragement to attend several different functions. They seem to sense that welcoming the stranger in their homeland is the hospitality of which the Bible speaks. They give grace with the struggle for choosing words in my second language and are just happy that I try to communicate.
So, I really don't have any epiphanies about how this all ends with a nice shiny bow on a pretty package. But I do believe, each day I grow closer to God as I seek to find my place in this great big world.
Matthew 6:33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Juanito,
ReplyDeleteAgain and still, your way with words, paint a great picture of this adventure you have sought. I envy the courage it took to make such a giant step. Your faith shines, as an example, to many.
God Bless
Thanks Carl - this is actually Lisa writing this week. We appreciate you keeping up with the posts and your prayers.
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